Roomate assaulted me

Yo guys, I usually come to this part of the forums with a really really lame excuse to post here, but this time I'm serious. I'm in college and living on my own with 2 of my friends (up until last night at 4am). One of my roomates is always making fun of me, calling me names, a loser, retarded, gay (no offense to the gay community of course) and he has this thing that whenever someone challenges him to a fight, he throws the first punch, and the second, and the third and so on, it could be anyone, and he's USUALLY drunk. This morning at 2am I got a call 'yo come pick us up from the bars', so I did, being a sober good friend. Then this roomate i'm referring to starts asking me at 2:30am to drive him to drink further downtown in the city, when I refuse he calls me a scumbag and an assh-, so I stop the truck dead and tell him "I'm tired of you pulling this all the time" , I finish driving us home and park, and say "no more rides anymore, GTFO out of my truck". So I'm fuming, trying to calm down, and I have never got into a full blown fight with him, hope I never will, he weightlifts everyday, he was in the Navy, he was in a violent fraternity and he's 7 years older.

I come back into the house after fuming and calming down on the front porch, and he starts talkign back to me about stopping the truck short and that I wouldn't drive him downtown, then I turn my back and he challenges my whole character (if you know me online, you know how nice I am) so I turn around with fists up "I oughtta beat the sh- outta you right now" and stand there, he walks over to me "you wanna hit me huh? you wanna hit me? he starts punching my head in, knocks my glasses off, "come on hit me, you wanna HIT ME RIGHT??" My other roomate tries to pull him off me amd continues to punch me and punches into my shoulder...why the shoulder?? So he finally gets pulled off of me, my other roomate starts talking to me, don't leave, just forget this happened, but I hate this guy so much.]

I stayed over one of my really good friend's rooms at the nearby college dorm. He's been helping me get through this all day, but now I have to first deal with, getting situated with the living arrangement, and I was talking to my family back home, and my real friends up here in Albany. my friends said I should have my roomate arrested, my parents want their lawyer to contact the landlord about (who's a lawyer also) monday, and I don't know what i want to do. So I just finished contacting the last person in this, my other roomate who pulled the guy off of me. And when I told him "someone has to leave, it's him or me, or I have to have him arrested" he said "well you were the one that put your fists up first" and I started thinking HE TOOK THAT ASSH- SIDE!!! and I told the roomate, I'm the Victim in this and I cant change what happened, he came at me and punched me and punched and this wasn't the first time he was violent with me!!! Then my other roomate hung up. What do you think I should do?

I would just leave. I don't think its worth having him arrested or anything cuz that would just add to the stress (even though I don't think he had a right to hit you). Are you under a lease or anything?

You did put your fist up, but he threw the first punch.

His fault, do whatever.
I would do anything to move out. If your other roommates liked the guy, you will forever be the one who kicked him out.
Staying would create some tension between you and the rest of your roommates.

However, talk to the rest of your roommates and see where they stand.


But, it sucks for you man. Luckily I'm a senior, I got one more year in this toilet.

If it's assault, then what you should do is pretty simple.
Of course, whether or not you'd want to is another matter.

Didn't I say something about not moving in with school friends some time ago?

and he has this thing that whenever someone challenges him to a fight, he throws the first punch, and the second, and the third and so on, it could be anyone, and he's USUALLY drunk.
You already knew how quick he is to fight, and you "invited" him to fight. In fairness, though, I know how hard it is to put up with it forever, so you "had enough". Trouble is, if you challenge an individual like that, your body better be able to cash those checks your mouth is writing.

Suck it up, do whatever you need to do to get out of there; it will only get worse. Nothing good will come from filing charges and it will make it impossible for you to stay, anyway.

The best thing to do in this case it to walk away. Verbal abuse is just like physical abuse. There is no disgrace in walking away and finding a new place to live. If your roommates are willing to tolerate this behavior then they are a guilty as the guy you got into a fight with. Unfortunately, when you challenged him by putting your fists up then you were truly the initiator of the fight. Unfortunately, he got the best of you and will continue to pursue you as a victim as long as you are in the immediate vicintiy of this guy. Retreat is an option that you should probably take. Live to fight another day!

Its been said already but I'll say it again, when you put your fists up you essentially started the fight... or at least indicated that you wanted one. However, I do understand that you were tired of his crap and just exploded for a second. But that part is over and you survived.

For the future, it seems your best bet is to get out of there. Getting him locked up for a night on battery charges won't do much but agitate the situation even more. Lawyers will do nothing but cost your family $600 and hour and land him in community service for 30 days. If none of your 'friends' are willing to help you out and this guy is that much bigger and so much more aggresive than you then you should go. Its not fair, its not right, but its reality. Sorry man, but you gotta pick your roommates more carefully.

sounds like things are going to get worse no matter what descion you make. about the only thing you can do in a three party situation where stories can change is to get a voice activated tape recorder and dont tell anyone you have it. that way no one can chage what they say or change sides. i checked and NY is a one party state, meaning you dont have to tell them your taping if you are present.

Move out.

Wait 3-6 months.

Set his car on fire and slash the tires.

Don't get caught.

Everything's gone mostly back to normal, my friend let me stay with him all weekend (best guy ever) and I was talking to my friends constantly telling me to get him arrested, but I didn't and I knew it woul cause me more problems anyway. Instead, I am super lucky, I was able to get my same room from LAST semester, moved back in today which is downstairs from my friend. As for the roomates, they called the landlord before I could and simply said " our roomate is moving out, is it okay if we pay his side?"="yeah as long as I get paid" >_> and I said "I don't want you guys t pay for me" they said "we don't want you to sublet because then we're gonna get a total stranger from craigslist, we want to wait until next semester to get someone we know to live with us, we're paying for you , you're an assh- and I think you should atleast pay your side, three months rent"

so here's what my genius mom told me to tell them: I already covered 2 of the 3 months with the last month's rent and the security deposit, and when the new guy moves in, you guys can split his sec deposit amongst yourselves, and I only owe you 300" even the guy that hit me agreed to this, and I'm on good terms with my other roomate and my stuff in my room, my packages and deliveries are gonna be safe (hint, check my avatar). Plus I didn't want to get the guy arrested, he'd get out soon and he's in my JAPANESE CLASS OF 20 PEOPLE. So I'm okay now, getting an extension on this weekend's homework and going to get my injuries checked out tomorrow. Thanks for the advice everyone.

Glad to hear you got out of there but

As for the roomates, they called the landlord before I could and simply said " our roomate is moving out, is it okay if we pay his side?"="yeah as long as I get paid" >_> and I said "I don't want you guys t pay for me" they said "we don't want you to sublet because then we're gonna get a total stranger from craigslist, we want to wait until next semester to get someone we know to live with us, we're paying for you , you're an assh- and I think you should atleast pay your side, three months rent"

I thought they wanted to pay your part... but you don't want them to... but they don't want to... and you don't want to either???

Glad to hear you got out of there but


I thought they wanted to pay your part... but you don't want them to... but they don't want to... and you don't want to either???


I also got confused at that part.

Sorry to hear this. Obviously both of your now old roommates need to grow up. A LOT.

Good luck.

You shouldn't have to pay for a portion of the rent if you are not going to be living there because you fear for your safety. That is a hostile living environment and you don't have any obligation to them. The asshat that attacked you should pay your part.

who's on the lease cuz you can kick him out no problem if he aint

who's on the lease cuz you can kick him out no problem if he aint

2 things, he is on the lease and my other roomate (who used to be a really good friend) would have trouble if one of the roomates was kicked out for fighting. Plus he's partly on the asshole's side. Bottom line, I never should have moved in with them. It was a really stupid mistake and even my class grades suffered from the whole situation.

If someone hit me repeatedly I would hit them back regardless of who it is. I don't care if it was a girl even, if she kept punching me in the face over and over she is going to get a nice shot in between the eyes (don't take that sexually). It is up to you if you want to stay with him or go or take revenge. Whatever you do, think it through. My brother and I get along great and there was one drunken night where he actually hit me square in the jaw. I went back and hit him till he dropped just for the fact I am not going to take someone hitting me.....especially when we are both drunk. The next day he apologized, we called it a drunken mistake and moved forward.

Take care of yourself!! Any update on this situation?